“Because I can.” — That’s the unapologetic reason Tracee Ellis Ross gives when asked why she often dates younger men.
On a recent episode of the “IMO” podcast hosted by Michelle Obama and her brother Craig Robinson, the award-winning actor got candid about her dating preferences — and how her confidence and life experience have shaped them.
Ross recalled a dinner conversation with the Obamas, where former President Barack Obama bluntly asked her why she chooses to date younger men. Her simple but powerful response:
“Because I can.”
But for Ross, it’s deeper than age. It’s about embodiment, agency, and self-knowing.
“I am a full, very whole person who knows myself, who is in charge of my life, and who lives a very full, just robust life,” she shared.
“It’s not just that I’m older, I’m also very embodied.”
Ellis Ross emphasized that the confidence she now walks with isn’t something age hands to you automatically — it’s something life teaches.
“It’s not just time. It’s life experience. It’s choosing to learn and grow.”
While the world often glamorizes younger love interests as eye candy, Ross suggests there’s a deeper compatibility.
“A lot of men my age are steeped in a toxic masculinity and have been raised in a culture where there is a particular way that a relationship looks,” she said.
It’s that outdated view of relationships that Ross firmly rejects. When she senses it, she doesn’t try to fix it — she walks away.
“When I catch a whiff of that dynamic, I exit stage left. I’m not doing it again.”
Younger men, she’s found, tend to bring a refreshing openness — emotionally and ideologically.
“There’s an openness — whether it’s in terms of gender fluidity or not even having an issue with homosexuality.”
And while younger suitors may show up “hot and gorgeous,” Ross makes it clear she’s not here to play teacher or therapist.
“I have long been past the age where I feel like it’s my job to teach somebody or grow them up.”
Tracee Ellis Ross has always been vocal about empowerment, identity, and owning your narrative. This conversation was no different — just another masterclass in confidence, clarity, and knowing your worth.
